After much to-ing and fro-ing, pushing and shoving, huffing and puffing that would do justice to the weekly shopping checkout at Tesco, I came to the decision at the beginning of 2004 to take a year out and re-think the direction of my life. A kind of karmic clear-out if you will. So apart from some CD releases on EMI this year my diary is completely blank. From January I have ceased taking referrals and have organised the other therapists to carry out all the Arts Clinic work. I have also cancelled my business appointments and passed everything on to my colleagues. I am making space for ME!

There are so many things I want to do and experience. Things that may be unimportant to other people but are extremely important to me. I am painting (decorating furniture at the moment), reading, cooking, seeing more of my beautiful children and many friends, re-connecting with my family, working with other Buddhists and spending time in the countryside of Oxfordshire and the Dordogne. I am having a complete clearing and sort out at my home in England and designing and renovating my little moulin in France. I am changing the focus of my life so that I can connect meaningfully with my environment and social community.

I am making decisions based on what I WANT to do rather than what I think I SHOULD do. I have thrown away my "in tray". This is not easy for me; I tend to take far too much responsibility for things that aren't actually my business! It is a creative experiment on my part but I don't see that I have any option but to follow my inclination in order to be happy. Its not that I haven't been happy with things up to now, more that I have grown out of that particular set-up and I need to discover a new one that gives me the kind of freedom I now require to express and enjoy myself.

I am preparing for the next phase of my life. At this point in time I don't know what awaits me, only that it will be wonderful. I am taking a great leap into the unknown - and once you let go it feels great!

In global terms these are very important times and I know the microcosm reflects the macrocosm, and vice versa, so it is perhaps apt that I would want to do this right now, to play my small part in my own circle of influence to the best of my ability. I hope that many more people are feeling the same.

So there you are.

I am chillin'.

More to come in April.